When most couples in long-term relationships think of affection, they think of either a quick kiss on the cheek (non-sexual) or full-blown intercourse. As you’ve heard me talk it about before: they fall into the trap of thinking sex = intercourse. “This (thinking) results in lower levels of both affection and intercourse” according to sex […]
5 ‘Gears’ of Touch Read More »
Have you ever come up with affirmations to say to yourself but they feel highly uncomfortable and fake? They might be statements such as… I am abundantly wealthy. I am enough. I am a strong, capable person. I am safe and protected. I deserve to be loved and to love. One reason they don’t feel
Why Affirmations Don’t Work Read More »
How do you align with your partner when your lives are very busy with kids, careers, a household, maybe aging parents or medical issues? Do you need a formal date night or weekend away together to do so? And how could you possibly fit that in with the kids’ activities or sports or family events?
But There’s Not Enough TIME To Connect As A Couple! Read More »
Often in session, we hear couples say, “We had a huge argument but can’t even remember what started it.” They’ll let us know it was a big blowout but can’t recall the beginning. As a couple’s therapist (and spouse for 25 years), I know why this is: you didn’t stick to the topic that started
Why Couples Can’t Remember What Started An Argument Read More »
The characteristics that we notice the most in others (both positive and negative) are often traits that we have ourselves. It’s startling to consider that a negative trait in someone (which often elicits a strong response in us) is a trait we have as well. Thus access a reflection of ourselves through a relationship with
How relationships act as mirrors Read More »
Most relationship experts don’t agree with the advice below. Read on to see how we refute these very common, but unhelpful, ideas: 1. You can change your partner. 2. If things aren’t going well, continue to live together but stay as separate as you can. 3. The kids come first. 4. Don’t go to bed
The Worst Relationship Advice AND A Couples Therapist’s Responses Read More »
Did you find yourself getting frustrated about the same things with your partner over and over? You’ve stated your requests again and again – why can’t your spouse just GET IT? Does it seem you’re both stating the very same things during each conflict? You are not alone. Many partners have core fights that they
Repetitive Arguments with our Partner: Why can’t they just GET IT? Read More »
Following the baby’s arrival, the daily household tasks that need to get done can explode. Between cooking, dishes, diapers, bottles, ordering and/or shopping for household items, cleaning, and laundry … tasks can be endless. There are decisions and purchases that have to be made and, for many, being conscious of a budget. The stress and
There is plenty of misinformation about couples’ sexual relationships online. It’s troubling because: a) searching for answers to questions online is SO easy; b) it can be difficult to know if you’ve found reliable and valid information that’s based on work done by experts; and c) you will come across worst case scenarios. And there’s
3 Most Common Myths about Long-term Relationships and Sex Read More »
Do you have an unsupportive partner? Has one of these scenarios happened to you? You’re hurt by something your sister did but your partner doesn’t seem to care. Something major just happened and your partner seems distracted and disinterested as you’re telling them. You’re angry about how you were treated at the bank and your partner tells you it’s not a big deal. You’re worried
7 Things You Can Do When your Partner Isn’t Being Supportive Read More »
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