talking

How to Talk In-Person: 4 Tools for Clear, Effective Communication

by Lauren Roberts, Practicum Student-Therapist under the Supervision of Meredith Keller LPC, ACS Talking has changed drastically in recent years: for many, the majority of ‘conversations’ are held through technology. These advances, however, can also have their faults. Have you ever felt like you were speaking to someone and it was like talking to a […]

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Couples Therapy Center of NJ

Does Intimacy Mean Sharing Absolutely Everything?

What is Intimacy? Is it tender and emotional sex each and every time? Is it sharing everything with one another? Is it constant closeness and togetherness? Popular belief says that those things make up intimacy, but that’s misleading AND unrealistic in a long-term partnership. For how could we possibly be together with our partner all

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Save Yourself From An Argument On Your Next Vacation

Imagine: you and your partner have planned a trip to a great summer destination. You each pack your own bags, arrive together and unpack when you get to your room. Your bag contains: books, boardgames, movies, candles, an eye mask, massage oil, and an assortment of teas. You’ve been looking forward to lazy days lounging

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Hurt By Hearsay? How Therapy Rebuilds Your Sense of Safety

Gossip – sometimes it seems we’re surrounded by it.  We hear it all the time.  It glares at us from nearly every grocery store headline.  Have you seen so-and-so’s new haircut?  What was he/she thinking?  And what about those two?  Can you believe they did that?! On the surface, gossiping can seem like harmless, idle

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Containing Our Emotions: When It’s Helpful To Hold Back

I usually write about allowing our feelings to be felt, to be talked about, and to be shown. Today, I’ve been thinking about the opposite: containing them – and how to know when to do what! Containing our emotions means to hold back how we’re feeling from someone else.  It’s what we do when we

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You’re Ready for Couples Counseling: Now How Do You Ask Your Spouse?

Have things been distant between you and your spouse for some time? Have you felt unhappy or stuck in the relationship? Are you finally ready to reach out to a professional rather than continue to stick your head in the sand, hoping things will magically improve? Are you ready to take that step BUT the

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Infidelity: How Working Through it Can STRENGTHEN a Marriage

We think we should be strong enough to survive alone. Regarding marriage, we think that if we are betrayed by an unfaithful partner, we should leave. Well-meaning friends tend to tell the spouse who was betrayed, “You should leave the bastard!” as if that’s the right, and only, response. But, leaving immediately is a poor

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It’s Mid-January and Your Resolutions Have Already Fallen To The Wayside: What Happened?

You said, “Next year I’m going to do things differently. Next year is the year I’ll finally stop doing ____ or start doing _____”. You start out with a firm resolve to make the changes last. But will they last? Many people begin the year strong and then eventually fall back into old patterns. It’s

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Getting What You Want: How Asking the Right Way Can Help You Get It

Most people are good at complaining and making negative comments about the things they aren’t happy with. It’s so easy to nag, pressure, nitpick and criticize. The critical comments roll off our tongues so easily; we often make them without giving them a second thought. Think about it – how many times have you voiced

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Will My Avoider or Pursuer Reaction Style Help Me Get My Needs Met?

When you’re upset, do you tend to pull yourself inside or express yourself outwardly?  Do you clam up?  This is the Avoider Style of reacting.  Do you persist in talking about the issue?  This is the Pursuer Style of reacting.  Which is your ‘go to’ reaction? And, could your reactions be making things worse? What

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Meredith Keller's Book

Relationship Essentials

You can purchase Meredith's book for $9.95 on amazon.com

Relationship Essentials book

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